Confidence?

Some days I wake up, look into the mirror and think, if I was a dude, I'll wanna fuck me too. I'm not exactly sure where such confidence come from but its undeniable that it's there. It's always been there. But after the years that confidence manifests differently.

I find I no longer speak my mind as much and is more often quiet now. Partly because I am currently mixing in circles that are not typical for me; partly also because I no longer find the need to explain myself to others. Where I used to find myself launching into a debate or argument to iron out difference of opinion, I have now accepted that everyone is entitled to their own opinion and that's the beauty of life. I am so confident that I no longer feel the need to start a debate to notch up a win for myself. I also realise how childish I am. I guess this is what people call adulting.

How did I get here you may ask? Well with a lot of introspection. I have been filling up my life with countless clutter and white noise precisely because it is human nature to fill in the blanks. But sometimes one has to go against the grain to find oneself. I have always advocated on taking the time to stop and look at where one is and figure out if I am closer to where I want to be or am I farther away. And it is time I take my own advise. I am facing my inner clutter and am working out the kinks within myself. This made life so much simpler. It's like using the Marie Kondo method but for my emotional baggage.

A lot of times we are so caught up in the rat race we forget to live. I was guilty of this. But the best thing is that I could and did make the decision to stop and smell the roses and boy, are they glorious. If you have been struggling with confidence issues or getting into mindless debates and want to stop, I wish you all the best.

Guess I've done enough boasting!

As the saying goes:

Let go, or be dragged.