When Roti Telur Was Luxury

This morning, my mother asked me what I wanted for breakfast. And after 2weeks of eating heaty things like ginger and wine, I opted for roti telur. Instead she said it was unhealthy and not a suitable diet for me, yet.

I still remember a time when roti telur was considered a luxury. It was many years ago but I remember it as if it is happening right before my eyes. I was about 7years old and at my babysitter’s sister’s house. She was also babysitting for another mother. I remember hearing her say that Charlie, the child she babysits, loves eating roti telur and has to have 2 of it every time. My eyes rounded in awe then squinted with jealousy. U see, at that time, those cute 8 shaped fake Smarties was a rare sighting and Chipsmore was basically unheard of. It was just how I grew up.

Ah, old times are so comforting. We think back and wondered how we lived that life and grew up unscathed and unperturbed by the things that other children tease us of never having. I guess I have to thank my parents for it. They kept me and my sister thoroughly grounded but still never squashed our dreams. Now, I’ve transitioned to a mother of a beautiful newborn baby girl and a wife to a wonderful husband. Now, I think about making more money, when I need to feed my baby and how is my husband doing. I wondered how my parents did it, how people just suddenly became mothers and fathers.

So much has changed, yet u wonder how so many things can still remain the same. I am 20 this year. I got married on the 2nd of October 2011 and gave birth to my baby on the 6th of December 2011. Being a wife is not easy, but being a mother is worse. I find I’m constantly confused, worried and angry by my baby’s cries and at the end of the day, I get disappointed with the way I handled her. Yet visiting friends are still who they are, having the same issue they have been battling and squabbling about the same people in classes. I often wondered how can I have changed so much and they still remained the same. So much has changed from the time when roti telur was a luxury.

Last month, I went back to visit my babysitter, it was so strange to see the same things I’ve seen growing up from this view now. Everything that was so familiar now looked so different from how I remembered it. This feeling im having? This feeling im trying to describe with this passage? I guess it just about the changes I’ve been feeling.

My first ring

The first ring i have ever worn was given to me by my then boyfriend.

We found ourselves stuck at KL Central and decided to just walk around to kill time.

Seeing a jewellery stall, i immediately dragged Paul along to look at earrings with me.

The earrings were a little too OTT for me, so i turned to go when i did a double take n noticed rings.

Then i contented the next 20minutes looking, trying on the rings and asking for their prices.

Then i finally decided that there were 2 rings worthy of my attention.

One was just too tight, the other was beautiful.

A simple band with a solitaire "diamond" in the middle.

I asked for the price, then i decided it was way too expensive to pay for this ring.

All this while Paul was standing beside me, looking almost as intently as i was at the rings.

He agreed that the ring was beautiful, he asked if i liked it.

I said yes, but wouldnt say anything more infront of the seller.

So we turned to leave. After a while, Paul asked me if i liked it.

I said i do but it is a hefty price to pay for such a ring.

We continued walking when i was suddenly attacked with the urge to visit the toilet on BIG business.

He sent and paid for me to use the better bathroom.

Finally when im done, I come out and he was nowhere to be found.

Just as i was about to call him, he appeared out of nowhere.

Then we took the train home.

Just before we reach home, in a deserted area, he surprised me by showing me a jewellery casing.

He asked me to open it. I did n there lay the ring we looked at in Central.

It was beautiful what he did for me.

I think it wasnt just that he gave me something.

But he took the time to look with me, to know what i like, to find a way to get the ring without my knowing and to present it to me the way he did.

Now this man is my husband and i cannot ask for anything more than that.

My mum is the best!

I'm in my 13 week now. Was having a lil trauma from all the hormones raging in my body and also some emotional stuffs but I'm fine now.

I've now cut down on many of my favourite food because it makes me throw up. But it's been getting better now. The only thing is nothing with garlic, onions or too much oil.

But I'm here to remind myself in later years how my family had helped me through this time and important I've come to realise they are to me (something I've overlooked for many years).

Every morning my mum would make a cup of milo and send it up to my room. Then she would proceed to the market and get some breakfast. When she comes back, she'll send the breakfast up to my room again. After that she would sit with me and talk to me to improve my mood. I noticed that I needed these talks whenever my mum had to go somewhere and couldn't talk to me that day. Then she would busy around cleaning the house and cooking porridge or noodles for me. In the evening, she would take walks with me.

Suffice to say, I felt lonely, helpless and useless when my mum is not around. She is so strong, I wish I had some of her strength. Now, its been almost 2months since she looked after me and I am grateful for all that she has done.

Ofcourse my father and sister had been very very supportive too. My dad would give my good advises and tend to me the best he can. My sis would cheer up my day whenever and wherever. But my mum sacrificed the most and for that I love her.

Hopefully I am able to stand on my own soon and get my own things done. My mum is the best!

20th May 2011

He proposed today.

It was amazing. It was everything I dreamed of and more. Although it was somewhat spoilt by my morning sickness, it was still the best day of my life.

He planned it a whole week in advanced. Staging it where we met (in the morning), in Asia Cafe.

When I arrived, he was there, in the shirt I met him in, in jeans and tie. He looked perfect. (I didn't). He stood up to greet me and my mum. They were accomplices in creating the perfect event. We sat and waited for some time for his cousin. Finally when the cousin arrived, the MV I made of both of us started playing except the video isn't on. Then he started saying something that sounded like "well, if u are sure u want to continue with the wedding, I think i will have to ask u something".

I wasn't paying attention because from his back, his friends started walking up to the table holding something behind their back and I started pointing to them suspiciously. Then they formed a line in front of our table and taking out the things they were hiding behind their back.

Suddenly it dawned on me that he was going to propose. His friends were holding cards. It reads "Lam Shun Peng, Would u ...... marry me?" Then his friend passed him a bouquet of flowers and he went down on a knee and asked me to marry him. I said yes!

anyway, idk what else to say. that says everything. it was perfect. =)

Ps. thankyou so much for the people who made it possible.

night walks

i met my friend just a few days back.

we were reminiscent-ing.

one time back in secondary school, we participated in a kadet polis camp.

there were only 3 non-muslim participants.

one is another chick who is from another school and sticks closely to her girlfriends.

so naturally, dudes were all over us.

theres an activity called "night-walk", which let me explain, is more like night race.

we had to race each team to the destination to be the winner.

easy enough, except we had to climb up the hill, get through teachers hiding behind shadows pretending to make scary noises trying to scare us, run down to the other end of the hill, all the while trying to stay together with a leader who only thinks of winning who is trying to navigate us to the right path with a mini torchlight and the sound of the thread of your t-shirt breaking because some wimpy juniors are too scared to move. oh and did i mention that u will be the one dragging these said juniors along too?

anyway, before i knew that was it, i was tagging along my friend, as usual.

one lame dude came up and decided to hit on my friend.

he was making a lame shit talk.

"hey, im ..........., what's your name?" <<< thats lame dude

*i stood by the side, staring at him. <<< thats me

"im ............" <<< thats my friend

"oh, nice to met u. where r u from?"

"im from .............."

"oh. im from ............."

* i remember thinking, who asked? but refrained from saying so.

"hey, theres the night-walk on later. u scared?"

* before my friend could answer, i couldnt resist saying

"scared? of who? u?"

i know..im a wreaker..haha..sorry jamie..=p

Horror Movies

I have a fetish for horror movies.

And I'm not referring the "scary movies" made by the Japanese.

I'm talking real business like The Exorcist and The Omen, both, the original uncut version.

It's not that I'm not afraid of these movies. In fact, Im terrified of them!

I couldn't sleep for a week after watching The Exorcist. I was 9 then.

But it's that they possess a I-can't-take-my-eyes-off-you quality.

I have a thing about out-of-this-world things, be it nice or scary elements.

I cnt take my eyes off of them!

That's why I cnt stop staring if I see someone kissing passionately or just being very sweet together. It's not that I'm a pervert, ok!

Anyway, I hate sitting with scaredy cats while watching a scary movie. They will watch the movie by peeping through their fingers. =.=

They will yell before anything happens, which scares me!

and make me yell too!

it gives me a greater heart attack then to get shocked by the movie itself.

So, if yr a scaredy cat, pls do not watch scary movies with me. Yr not welcomed.

For me, what makes the movie scary is the story behind it, Japanese ones are more of gruesome and disgusting, not scary. But the Thailand horror movies, those are really scary!

and I think that Malaysian horror story can be as good as that because we have the basic element needed for it, the traditional-ness that makes everything scarier. But it will need a good script writer, director and actors.

Anyway, I'm supposed to come up with a sci-fi storyline. Wish me luck!

assignments!

im so tired!

what with the amount of assignments and the going out with friends, days are passing by like crazy.

life is so much better and more meaningful when you are occupied with something beneficial..=)

im doing my storyboard for animation.

i make stick people look bad, so try and imagine me drawing the environment for a society. i would not want to be the people i draw for my city..haha..

im using the song Dream by Priscilla Ahn starred in the movie Bride Wars.

chao!

wish me luck in drawing.

My Collection Of Top Love Songs

I love tuning in to love songs..=)

I listen to them when I'm feeling sleepy, feeling romantic or even when I need to relax.

(but not when I'm bored).

Most importantly, I listen to them when I missing someone.

*note that its about all kinds of love..

On my soundtrack are

- The Only Exception - Paramore

- Sway - Micheal Buble

- Fight for This Love - Cheryl Cole

- You're Still The One - Shania Twain

- Through The Rain - Mariah Carey

- In This Club - Usher ft. Beyonce

- Baby Love - Nicole Scherzinger

- What Can I Do - The Corrs

- Mama - Spice Girls

- Your Guardian Angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

- So Close - Jon McLaughlin

- A Puro Dolor - Son by Four

- All I Want Is You - Barry Louis Polisar

- Anyone Else But You - Micheal Cera & Ellen Page

- This Will Be An Everlasting Love - Natalia Cole

- You've Made Me So Very Happy - Gloria Estefan

- Is It You - Cassie

- Because Of You -98 Degrees

- Now and Forever - Richard Marx

- Tears In Heaven - Eric Clapton

- Ain't No Other Man - Christina Aguilera

- I'll Be There for You - Bobby Vinton (Friends theme song)

- Endless Love - Luther Vandross

- I Think I'm In Love - Jessica Simpson

- 1000 Miles - Vanessa Carlton

- All I Have - Jennifer Lopez

- Ignition - R. Kelly

- I Don't Love You - My Chemical Romance

- Im Your Angel - Celine Dion ft R. Kelly

- You've Got Me Wrapped Around Your Finger - Beth Rowley

- When I Look To The Sky - Train

- Story of A Girl - Nine Days

- Baby I'm Yours - Artic Monkeys

- How Deep Is Your Love - Bee Gee

- Let It Be - Beatles

- Imagine - John Lennon

- Massachusetts - Bee Gees

I'm listening to it as I write..

hmmm...I'm going to sign out and enjoy my music.

see u soon!

ps. cats are down my kitchen, out doing their thang..=/

ME time

I've been spending some time thinking of what I want in life. And its decided.

I want to write!

I would like to write for a living!

I would like to write about travelling, about what I've seen, about my opinion or simply, just writing. My way.

And I know that not many companies will hire or even take in someone who do not have anything to show. When they say they like writing. Thats why I decided to blog more often.

Well, I didnt actually notice it by myself.

Paul helped.

And he is still away, countdown is at 21 more days.

Hopefully he will be able to get back earlier..Miss him much.

Just sent in my Mtk stuff..

Shun, out!

Now

It's a weird thing, looking and thinking of your past. Because knowing what happened between that time and now makes all the difference.

I spent 1 year regressing about a friendship that turned sour/ gone wrong. (til now, I'm still not sure.) I wonder what was it I did or even what was it that I didnt do that caused this to happen.

Finally, after putting in some courage and effort, I met up with said friends and found out that they were not who I thought they were. Because I lost the friendship, i put them up on a pedestal to somewhere so high up, I bullied myself into thinking that I can never be on the same level as them.

Now, being able to look detachedly at them, I know, it is true, I can never be on the same level as them. I lost that friendship because it is not a friendship I would want to maintain. I just didnt realise it then.

Tioman

( sunset at Salang )

Hello!

I've been holding disappearing acts on and off, but I promise that Ill blog more often. Cross my heart. ;)

How was yr holiday?

Mine was great!

Went to Pulau Tioman for 5 days with the family. We spent 2 nights at Salang Village and 2 nights at Berjaya Tioman Resort.

My mum decided that we will get there by flight since I've never been on a plane before. As we were waiting to board the plane, i got excited. Little did I know that Ill be regretting this decision. Alas, I am afraid of flying! My dad kept asking me to look out the window as we land, the scenery is beau.ti.ful.! but i was too scared.

( my very first boarding pass )

After about an hour of torture, we finally landed on the island. We paid a few ringgit for the conservation of the island and proceeded to the nearby jeti to catch a boat to Salang.

The boatman agreed to send us there, but he was not sure if that beach is open. We went there on a small motor boat. It was a refreshing ride filled with scent of salt..haha..

When we finally reached there, it was empty and my dad asked the boatmen to wait for a while to check if anything is open. but the boatmen left straightaway, abandoning us.

Lucky for us, 1 chalet was open. Its the one at the front most of the beach.

Toilet is lousy but everything else is ok. I mean why spend so much on accommodation if yr not going to be there the whole day?

( this is how the room looks like )

As it was monsoon season, the place was close to empty so we had the whole beach to ourselves! But the downside is that all diving centers and water activity are not allowed or closed. And only 1 restaurant was open.

The place is great! I only need to wade in waist high water to see fishes swimming round my legs. The water is so clear that i can see reefs while walking on the jeti. In the evening, my sis and I went hunting for sea cucumbers. They are so cute! We actually took it out of the water and held it in our hands. But some will start spewing water once u take 'em out of the water. Kinda gross when they do that.

( nope, its not a rock, but sea cucumber in its soft form )

Mobile service at Salang is horrible. So unless u are a Celcom user, your cell phone would be close to useless during your stay there. But u could try walking slowly at the shore raising your cell phone to the sky to try to get signal. Goodluck. hehe..

Berjaya Resort is ok. I guess if u need luxury accommodation, it'll be your forte.

So thats it!

ps. after hunting for sea cucmbers, we came back with many sand-fly bites. Its horrible. Use "mopiko", works very well. =)